Drama Queen

So over the last 48 hours, I've heard the phrase, "you ruined my whole day" out of Lauren's mouth more times than I can count.  I have no idea where she picked it up, or when, but her use of it is increasing each day.  And with each use, it gets funnier and funnier (I'm sure this is not her intended outcome, but unfortunately for her, that is the way it comes off).

A couple of examples from the past two days . . . On Wednesday morning, I had to run to Target to get more formula for Ellie.  We only had a one hour window from the time Ellie woke up from her nap to the time Lauren's bus would be here to get her so when it was time to go, it was time to go.  Upon informing Lauren that we would be making the trip to Target, she became upset and said she didn't want to go.  I told her she had to, and that was the first time I heard the dreaded phrase . . . "you ruined my whole day."  Who knew a trip to Target could cause such pain in a little girl's life.  After I heard her say that, I laughed, she repeated it again, and we headed out.  Later that night while I was upstairs giving Ellie a bath, I heard some screaming and crying coming from downstairs (Trav and the two big kids were down there) and knew if was Lauren.  The screaming and crying lasted a couple of minutes before it was quiet.  Not a minute later, Lauren was poking her head into the bathroom and telling me through tears that, "Daddy spanked me hard three times - he ruined my whole day."  The minute she ended her story, Trav poked his head in the bathroom and gave his far less dramatic version of the incident - "she didn't listen so I spanked her twice but it wasn't hard."  Whatever really happened I may never know, but I'm pretty sure it didn't involve a brutal beating as Lauren would have you believe.  To bring the day to an end, Lauren and I were cuddling together on her bed after we read our nighttime story.  So there we are holding hands (she wanted to to make sure I wouldn't fall off the bed) and laying together while she is singing a song and running her fingers through my hair.  It was such a sweet moment (bedtime is the best time with Lauren - all of her rage and anger is out of her system by then), and then to top it off, she said, "I love you Mommy."  I in turn responded with, "I love you too Sweetie" and then got up to leave the room.  As I was pulling the door shut behind me I hear Lauren say, "Daddy spanked me three times and you made me go to the store so you ruined my whole day" - and the moment of sweetness is gone just like that!

And then there was today.  I was picking the kids up from the daycare at the Y when Lauren comes out of the playzone crying.  I asked her what was wrong and she says, "somebody ran into me - it ruined my whole day."  It was about 5:45pm at the time so the place was packed with people dropping off and picking up kids and because Lauren only has one volume (which is loud), pretty much every parent within earshot heard this is busted out laughing.  There is my child, standing all red -faced, clenching her check and sobbing while saying at the top of her lungs that her day was ruined because some kid accidentally (although Lauren's version of the story has the boy doing it on purpose) ran into her - talk about a pathetic scene.  All I could do was smile and tell her it would be okay all the while I'm trying to hold in my laughter because all of the other adults in the place were laughing at her - that's our Lauren.  To make the story even better, on the ride home Lauren was recounting the incident when she all of a sudden comes to the conclusion that the naughty boy who hit her was probably Jacob Niemi (for all of the non-regular readers, Jacob Niemi is the naughty boy in Ryan's class whom is already on Lauren's shit list for picking on her brother) because apparently all naughty boys must be Jacob Niemi.  When Ryan heard this, he asked what the boy looked like.  Lauren told him he had, "yellow hair just like me."  Ryan said, "Jacob has brown hair so it wasn't him."  Lauren responded with, "he had brown hair with a little yellow just like me."  This of course made Ryan mad because he knew Lauren was lying.  So the rest of the ride home I spent listening Ryan defend Jacob while Lauren kept saying over and over that Jacob was indeed the boy who hit her - talk about fun!

Other fun facts about Lauren . . . she is stubborn, and not just a little.  The other day she held her pee for 18 hours - 18 HOURS!  Who does that?  I of course brought her into the doctor because not urinating for 18 hours is a problem for normal people, but not Lauren.  No, there was nothing wrong with her, she apparently just didn't want to pee just because she didn't want to.  I finally made her pee by laying her down and aggressively tickling her stomach until she basically started peeing her pants (that was not a good day - I had a beer at 2pm which was just after we returned from the doctor's office where I'm sure everyone thought I was exaggerating on the length of time since her last urination - too bad I wasn't).

Lauren also likes to "test the waters."  If you tell Lauren not to do something, she'll do it again.  Then, if you say, "if you do that again, I'll (fill in the blank with some sort of threat)", she'll for sure do it again just to see if you make good on your threat.  I'm good for about 50-75% of my threats, it just depends on how much she has worn me down on any given day - this is something I'm working on.

Time seems to be of no issue to Lauren.  When I say, "we're leaving now" or "it's time to eat", her response, "in 5 minutes."  I'm pretty sure she came up with that number simply based on the fact that that's the number of fingers she has on one hand and she always holds up the hand when saying this.

In addition to time not being an issue for Lauren, neither is money.  When she doesn't get something she wants from Ryan or Ellie, or pretty much anyone, she'll say, "I'll give you $20."  Apparently she doesn't realize she is 3 and has no money, but you'd be surprised how many times this actually works.  At this point, I think she probably owes Ryan about $240 - too bad it could be a lifetime before he sees any of it.

At this point, if I'm not an alcoholic or a drug addict by the time Lauren is 13, I'll consider this a victory.  Now I know why God gave us Ryan (Mr. Manners) first . . . he wanted to give us a little bit of nice and easy before the storm (we like to call her Lauren) came into town - thanks, I hope you're happy!

The 3 little pigs

It's official, we have 3 little pigs in this family!  Today for lunch I decided to take the easy road and throw in a frozen pizza.  In addition to the pizza, we had a variety of fruits (blueberries, strawberries, and bananas) to fill up the crew.  To my surprise (and amazement) the kids (all 3 of them - this was Ellie's first try at pizza) not only ate an insane amount of fruit, but they also finished off the entire pizza by themselves (good thing I wasn't all that hungry anyway).  I always feed the kids first and then sit down and eat whatever is leftover, but today, there never seemed to be a stopping point for any of them.  The minute I would get one piece of pizza cut up, a different kid would want more.  Ryan and Lauren both ate over a third of the pizza, and little, bitty Ellie put back a good sized piece of her own (pretty sure she had a bottomless stomach today).  Here are some pictures of Ellie in all of her glory (too bad she had a white shirt on underneath - by the time lunch was done, the sleeves were red, blue, and gross).

A fun side note about the pictures . . . if you look closely (actually, you don't have to look closely because anyone with decent vision could see it) at the last three pictures, you'll notice Ellie has her top two teeth now.  You may (again, if you have any sort of decent vision) also notice, the rather large distance between the two teeth (I think there is enough room in there for another whole tooth).  Trav likes to call her our little "gopher" (or beaver, I can't remember which one it is for sure) and wonder how such a cute little girl could have such nasty teeth.  I, on the other hand, choose to see all the wonderful benefits of having such a large gap in her teeth . . . she'll never have to floss between those teeth because nothing will ever get stuck, if her hands are ever full, she can use the "gap" as another place to hold things.  And finally, maybe she'll be a really good whistler.  I always wanted to be able to whistle using my two fingers the way really cool people do it, but because I can't, I'd be honored if my daughter could finally be the one to do it for me!

Do they have braces for 10-month old kids?

NEVA!!!

Sometimes I feeling like I'm living in the ghetto with Lauren - why you ask?  Well, we all know she has her speech issues, but lately, I think things have really started to improve.  Uncle Mike is no longer "Uncle Dike."  And "milk" is no longer "dilk" - so we are making progress in some areas, but apparently not with the "er" sound.  And boy does it drive Trav crazy!!  He thinks she just talks too fast and doesn't take the time to make the proper sounds.  Maybe he is right, but until she gets it figured out, I'm enjoying her saying things such as, "neva brotha" when she is mad at Ryan, or "she is my sista" when referring to Ellie.  She sounds like she is straight from the hood and I thoroughly enjoy listening to it - you go girl!

Leave me alone!

Just to prove that our little sweetheart does have some built up rage in her little body . . . here is a clip of Ellie riding her horse (there is no rage in the video, that comes after).  The pictures afterwards (although a little blurry) catch the rage when her two older siblings try to stop her rocking.  And the final picture is the calm after the storm (Ryan and Lauren are no longer touching her precious horse) so Ellie is good again.

The sad (or funny depending how you look at it) thing about these pictures, is that I told the kids to mess with Ellie.  Somehow in my sick mind, I think it is funny when she gets mad, clenches her teeth, and screams - god, I'm a horrible mom!

On the move

Our little girl is finally moving (I'm excited about it, but also not so much).  This means no more leaving her in the middle of the room and coming back to find her in the exact same spot - that was so easy!  Ellie has figured out how to move her arms and legs in order to do a slow, but steady crawl to get to where she needs to go.  Check her out in action this morning.
In addition to the crawling, she has also sprouted two new teeth and loves to grind them - so incredibly annoying!  I can't think of a worst sound then hearing two little tooth nubs being rubbed against each other - just the thought of it makes me cringe!  The little girl can also say, "momma" (only when she wants to of course as evidenced by her lack of response in the video), and wave bye-bye, clap hands, and break out a crazy dance move with her head (I have tried and failed to video this numerous times - hoping to get it once before she moves onto another talent) at a moment's notice.  She is growing and changing like crazy and we are loving every minute of it!  Our final baby is officially 10 months old today - the days are going way to fast!

Onto Lauren . . . this little girl received a very special gift last week from her Auntie out in California.  What could it be . . .an over the top tu-tu custom made just for a special little girl who loves to dance - she couldn't be happier - thanks again Auntie for your time and energy in making this special gift!

The tu-tu, complete with leg warmers, and a body suit (I'm not sure what the technical name is) are broke out at least once a day so we can all sit back and watch Lauren in action.  She has already requested a second tu-tu from Auntie (this one is to be purple - her favorite color at the moment), and a pair of ballerina shoes to complete the outfit.  The shoes will probably happen, the tu-tu is completely up to Auntie.  I am again left to wonder how I got the daughter who loves everything pink, purple, and super girly!

And finally, the boy.  He had another birthday party this past weekend.  It seems like he attends at least one a month now-a-days.  Anyway, this party was different in that it was a sleepover - that mom had to be borderline crazy.  Seven 5 and 6 year old boys sleeping over at one time - what was she thinking?  Considering the fact that I had never met these people, I was a little skeptical about letting Ryan spend the night.  That, and the fact that he is only 5 and has never slept at any one's house other than relatives, led me to the conclusion that this would not be his first sleepover.  He did attend the party, but when 8:15pm rolled around and some of the other boys were getting into their jammies, Trav was picking Ryan up to bring him home.  Surprisingly, he wasn't too upset.  We had told him before the party that he wouldn't be sleeping over, and one of his good buddies also was picked up so that helped.  It is crazy to think Ryan is getting old enough (by some people's standards) to even be invited to a sleepover.  It is just a matter of time before this becomes the norm - wow is all I can say to that!

Another snow day

So, what do you do on a day full of snow and no school? You hang out and watch cartoons in Mom and Dad's bed - check out the crew this morning.

They are all patiently waiting for their morning "coffees" - the two older kids like some warm cocoa while Ellie prefers a warm bottle - before they settle in and watch their favorite morning cartoons (a real big deal in Ryan's book considering he never gets to watch cartoons on school mornings).

After a full day of lounging around and staying warm, the kids were more than happy to help Daddy out with the never ending task of shoveling snow - I have to ask myself again, how did this happen?  I thought the long, dark days of winter were over when we had that glimpse of Spring last week - guess I was wrong.

For anyone that has read previous posts on this blog (and for those who have a very good memory), you'll notice Lauren is wearing new snow pants in these pictures compared to past ones.  Why you ask?  Well, in true Lauren style, she has already (in about 3 months) outgrown her snow pants.  At the beginning of the winter, she was cute and stylish in her matching Columbia snow outfit.  Now, she gets whatever is big enough to fit her - in this case, it is Ryan's old snow pants (the pair he just outgrew last year - they are a size 6), and a second pair of his size 12 boots (I forgot to mention she outgrew her boots as well, and now is wearing the same size Ryan wears.  It should be noted though that they are a little big, but with a couple of pair of socks, they fit just fine).  I'm planning on looking for some new snow gear for next year (which is on clearance now), the only problem I'm having is deciding if I buy a size 7 or 8 (for the snow pants).  I already bought some size 13 boots for her - now I'm starting to wonder if those will even be too small! 

My shoe calculations for Lauren are concerning . . . at age 3 she is wearing a size 12, by the age of 15, she should be in a size 60 - now where in the world am I going to find that!?!?

What happened?

So Ryan and I were standing at the window and looking outside this morning . . . Ryan: "What happened to Spring?"  Me: "I have no idea buddy, no idea."  Ryan:  "And it was supposed to be an early one too" (shrugs his shoulders and walks away).  Here is what we were looking at . . .

Another good one from Ryan . . . I'm just drying off Lauren in the bathroom.  Ryan comes running in and says, "Mom, it's your lucky day."  I ask, "Why?"  He says, "I've got to take a poop."  The kid knows what makes his momma happy - a poop a day for everyone!

And here are a couple of pictures from tonight.  Playing on the kitchen floor is what the girls do for fun when there is nothing else to do - thank god simple things make them happy.